View from the box.

Thats the view from the luxury skybox suite I was lucky enough to get to watch the Packers game from on Sunday. It was quite the experience for someone who has never been to Lambeau Field. My girlfriend got invited to attend with a business contact and I got to tag along. She didn't even make me root for the Lions even though she does, being from Detroit originally. In fact she put up with a lot of crap from me as the Lions lost 26-0.

We drove up to Appleton and met the 'bus' which was an RV that had all the bedroom stuff removed and more seats and tables added. We were on the bus around 945am.. beers in hand.. headed for the tailgate party before the game. We arrived in Green Bay about 45 minutes later and had a reserved spot for the RV right across the street from Lambeau. There was a party going on at the house we parked at that was also sponsored by the company we were attending with. Steak sandwiches, brats and more beer! We hung out here for about 45 minutes and then started to make our way up to the suite.

This suite was something else. 2 fridges stocked with beer and soda.. full liquor cabinets with all the mixers and alchohol you can think of. Cold sandwiches, brats, pulled pork sandwiches, chicken wings, nachos, cheese and crackers, veggie and fruit trays, gourmet desserts.. all laid out for just the 20 people that were in our suite. Theater like seating.. comfy padded chairs with a view out a huge window that covered the entire front wall of the suite on the 45 yard line. It was of course climate controlled so we were not out in the wind and chilly fall temps, not that Sunday was bad for Lambeau.

It was quite an experience watching the game from that suite, but what really struck me was how die hard those Packer fans are. Even though it was just the Lions.. which is pretty much a sure win for anyone at this point...they were all out in force. Close to 72K fans (capacity for Lambeau) came to watch the game and support their team. Green and Gold everywhere enjoying the pre-game tailgaiting as well as the post-game celebration. A lot of people don't know this, but if you sign up for the waiting list for Packers season tickets, you will be waiting a long long long time. This is right off their website:

How long is the waiting list for season tickets? How do I sign up?

The season ticket waiting list has more than 81,000 names. The Packers tell fans adding their names that the average wait is 30 years. To get your name on the season ticket waiting list, click here.

Most season tickets are passed on among family members.. even willed to the next generation. Say what you want about the Packers, but you would be hard pressed to find a group of fans more dedicated to their team and who treat football and the Packers as a way of life. Hell there was one guy walking bye us on the way out that had on full gear.. cleats, football pants, official jersey, the works like he was hoping enough people would get injured that they would call him in to play. Maybe he should have worn a Lions jersey instead.. they probably would have put him in.
:P

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Sticker Wanted: Don't Touch, You are too stupid.

Yesterday was one of 'those' days. The kind where you have to be at work before 2am for server maintenance and then just goes on and on and on from there. The early morning stuff actually went pretty smooth and we were hoping for a nice relaxing day to celebrate. This was not to be however.

Shortly after 8am the calls started coming in. Department heads were calling looking for my boss, who was on vacation yesterday signing his house papers (Congrats man!) and thus those calls come to me. We found out the clinic was on the verge of shutting down and everyone was in a panic. The problem? Severe network connectivity issues at the facility that houses all the medical facilities and clinics. They couldn't run any of their medical programs and thus couldn't provide patient care properly.

So after assuring about 12 different people that we were indeed working on it (which took about 30 minutes of time that I actually COULD have been working on it) we started to track down what was wrong. A switch closet at that location has the two switches that provides the bulk of the connections for that area. We went over armed with a new switch and started to figure out what was going on.

I know some of you are glazing over already.. so I won't bore you with the technical stuff. I will just say that after some troubleshooting we found that the fiber links for those switches were not in the right places. We moved them and suddenly everyone was back to work and the clinic was open for business. You could see the mixed emotions on the faces of the personnel over there as we informed them that they could all indeed work again. :P

So how did this happen is the real question. Do connections on switches that have been working for 3+ years suddenly jump ports on their own? Was it the wiring closet gnomes? A vindictive tooth fairy? Who knows for sure. So what I want is a big sticker to put on the switches that says "Don't Touch. You are too stupid"

Its a simple rule really. You add up the blinking lights on the device and then divide that number by your IQ and if the result is a number greater than 1, DON'T FUCKING TOUCH IT. Clearly the 6 brain cells you have rattling around in that cavernous wasteland you call your skull are all going to be mesmerized by the 'pretty lights' and you aren't going to do anything but make it worse. The only downside to that simple rule.. is the people who shouldn't be touching it probably can't handle the math that the rule involves anyway. So maybe we should keep it simpler. If you are even the slightest bit unsure if you should be touching it... then DON'T!

After a 15 hour day yesterday.. I am ready for a half day today followed by a nap and then many beers and passing out for about 12 hours. I leave you with some of the most amazing guitar playing you will ever see. Timmy is just incredible.

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Compatible Crazy

It's a phrase I have tossed around for years now and I still get some weird looks when I mention it, but I feel it is a valid statement when relationships are involved. I am not talking strictly about romantic relationships either. Friendships are subject to the same rules in my opinion.

See I look at it this way. You are born and you are sweet and innocent. Shortly thereafter, you start to develop and are influenced by all manner of things around you. By the time you clear high school you have been subject to so many experiences and personalities and outside influences that you can't help but develop some crazy. Then you go off to college where part of your job is to act crazy and hang out with even crazier people than you.

So by the time you are in your 20's, everyone is crazy in their own way. We all develop our own quirks and eccentricities. Something that if a stranger walked by you and caught you doing it or saying it they would be thinking to themselves that you are a nutjob. It's just a fact of life. Those 'normal' people are every bit as crazy too.. don't let them fool you. They are just less outwardly obvious with their crazy. Go check their closet and you will find how they have to organize every shirt and pair of pants by color/pattern/style and how if even one is out of place they won't be able to sleep soundly. EVERYONE has their own crazy.

So the key to relationships in this world full of crazy people? Compatible Crazy™ What you need to do is find someone who's crazy you can truly appreciate and who understands and appreciates your crazy in return. It is delusional to think that you are not crazy, or that you can find someone else that is not crazy to have a relationship with. Give up that notion now and it will make your life a lot easier.

Be yourself. Embrace your crazy. Wave your crazy flag high for all to see. What you will find is people that 'get' you. That see you and your craziness and think to themselves "I like his/her crazy" Those are the people you will truly connect with. If you find yourself hiding those parts of your personality to be what you think someone else expects or desires of you, STOP. You are doing yourself a disservice and besides, that person might just surprise you and appreciate you all the more for sharing the other parts of your personality. If they don't, at least you are being yourself and it's their loss at that point.

If you think you are having one of those days where your mental instability is overwhelming...just remember there is always someone a step ahead of you still. Like her:



Life is too short to try and be anything other than who you are. Embrace that bat-shit crazy person living in your head and be happy. Find people with Compatible Crazy™ and enjoy being you. Anything else is lunacy!

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Happy Birthday!

Today my YOUNGER son turns 12 so I had to wish him a happy birthday, despite the fact that he doesn't read my blog. Hard to believe that I have managed to keep not one, but TWO children alive for 12 and almost 14 years. Here's a picture of my boys.. many years ago:



Hard to believe that those adorable little faces are now 12 and soon-to-be 14. 6th and 8th graders. No longer do they want you to sit on the couch and watch Teletubbies or Barney or some other show designed to make and adult's brain ooze slowly out of their ears. No longer do they spend hours playing with blocks and little action figures. The days of giving them cardboard wrapping paper tubes and watching them become medieval knights for an afternoon....gone.

They are products of this generation for sure. I was thinking about this the other day and some of the things I came up with were crazy. They don't know a life without internet access or even high-speed internet access. They don't know life without CD's. They don't know about 8-tracks and records, rotary phones and having to look stuff up in books and encyclopedias.

Last month my cell bill came in.. and my two youngsters put up big numbers. B managed to clock in around 1300 texts for the month and G just over 1100. When you factor in that they can't have them on or even out of their locker during the school day, that is a LOT of text messages in the remaining time in the evenings and weekends. Yes, both boys have cell phones now and I know there are those of you think they are too young, and you are entitled to your opinion. Just remember the fact that they are my kids and I don't give a shit about your opinion! :P

My kids are done with Spongebob and High School Musical now. They watch Scrubs and House. They play the 360 and Wii and computer games. They will never understand Atari or Pong. The only Daisy Duke they will know is Jessica Simpson. They don't know who the A-team or MacGyver is. If I asked them what KITT was...I would probably get an answer like 'Half a Kit Kat bar?' /sigh

I am constantly amazed these days about how fast they are growing now. I know everyone thinks that they don't change as much as when they are infants / toddlers, but I am starting to disagree with that. I see changes happening faster and faster. They are not learning to roll over or walk for the first time, but they are developing as young adults at an alarming rate. Somedays so fast it seems like a blur that I can't get to slow down. You know when you watch something with your kids and you see the adult humor go over their head and chuckle to yourself? Now they are laughing along with me! They are getting into the deeper issues that are brought up and actually THINKING about them. Sure a lot of their responses are still that of a child or teenager, as they should be, but I am still shocked by some of the thoughts coming out of those heads.

This time next year I will be attending events for my HIGH SCHOOL STUDENT. How scary is that? I am not one to get all misty eyed and nostalgic, but I can't help but wonder where my little guys went? The ones that would wrestle around with dad on the bed and not stop laughing? Oh don't get me wrong, they still like to wrestle and roughhouse, but now the two of them against me is starting to be in their favor and if they are not careful they could certainly hurt someone. And by someone I mean me. :P

So Happy Birthday to my BABY boy, my young man. 12 today. Growing up and making me proud to be known as Gabe's Dad.

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The Little Bastards

As a parent, I have come to terms with the fact that my boys are moving into that teenager age group. It was inevitable I suppose. And while the changes were subtle at first, they seem to have accelerated as of late and if I stop and think about their actions and attitudes even a year ago, the difference can be staggering. I know all parents are shocked by how fast their kids grow up, but I honestly can't remember this kind of rate of change since they were toddlers and it seemed like every week was a new milestone.

So what's the big difference? They are not driving yet (thank god) and although B is in 8th, they are both still in the middle school. They are still doing the same activities for the most part. They have the same group of friends. They have the same responsibilities at home. So other than them getting older, there hasn't been any big dramatic changes. So the only real difference is attitudes. They are becoming little bastards. Or as my ex put it so well, "When did my boys start acting like assholes?"

Now before I freak out my poor Mother, they really are the same great kids they always were. When interacting with adults, teachers, parents of friends etc., they are generally as well behaved and respectful as they always were. However, when it comes to their siblings or friends.. sometimes I just have to shake my head and walk away. The teenage attitude is there. The "I am the greatest and you should all bow down before me" is there.. in full force.

I have siblings and I know what the whole sibling rivalry situation is. My boys have always had that as well. Antagonizing each other. It's changed now though. Often times now its not the joking and wanting to be a pain in the ass to the other. It has morphed into false sense of superiority. The whole "I know everything and thus anything you tell me is stupid and I shall look upon you with disdain and mock your stupidity." I am just waiting for that to transfer to parental stuff as well. Maybe it won't happen....maybe my boys will be the exception to the rule...maybe? /sigh

It is still fun to watch them grow and change. Even if I am not a huge fan of all the changes. I suppose them being assholes is part of their rite of passage into manhood. Much like girls getting their cycles and becoming crazy bitches? :P

Regardless, they are still good kids and no matter what, I still love those little bastards!

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Angry Turtle!

I stumbled across the coolest drinking acessory today in explaining what a Black and Tan was and how they were poured. I give you.. ANGRY TURTLE!!



How fuckin cool is that? An angry turtle that both opens your beer bottles as well as helping you pour the perfect B&T. It comes in a kit with matching coaster and pint glasses. Absolutely awesome. You can see it here.

I need to get one of those.. and two kegerators. One for my Guinness and one for my Bass. Then I big 4-season porch so I can sit out and enjoy my beer and a good cigar to relax. Ahhh.. someday. When I am rich and famous. Or something. :P

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Let's Reverse It

The normal work week is 5 days on, 2 days off for the weekend. After just having a 5 day weekend, I am suggesting we reverse that setup. Let's work 2 days and have 5 days off every week. Hell, I would be willing to put in 2 15 hour days to get 30 hours in if I could have a 5 day weekend every week. Think about it.. you would come to work refreshed and relaxed every week and know you have 2 days to focus and get stuff done. Well.. one can dream anyway.

I feel like I should have done something productive with all that time off, but other than getting a few workouts in and a couple of small errands run, it was all just relaxing. The boys and I did a marathon on Sunday for Scrubs season 8. I hadn't seen most of the episodes, so it was a blast to sit and watch them and just laugh and laugh with my boys. They love the show as much as I do and we were all a bit sad watching the last two episodes which were both the season and series finale. I can't say enough good things about this show. The combination of the off-the-wall craziness and the very down to earth way they deal with real issues was just incredible. If you have not watched the show.. do it.

I also watched season 5 of House, MD. I have been waiting for this season to be released on DVD and been looking forward to watching it even though my Mom gave me a huge spoiler last time she was out to vist with the whole "Hey.. you like House right? Can you believe SoAndSo died?" Never mind the fact that she KNOWS I watch shows like that on DVD when they are released and not during the year when they are on. Still, the show is awesome and I really enjoyed this season. I won't discuss anything here though in case you are still waiting to watch it. I won't be a RUINER!

Having the 5-day weekend at least took the edge off my jealousy that my two nephews are on the beach in Hawaii with my sister and BIL and my parents. Seriously.. Zane at not-even-one-year-old has already been to Hawaii more times than I have. There is something not quite right about that picture. :P All I know is that it's a good thing I can't ear flick someone through a text message. When your sister whines about having to do a load of laundry for an hour .. IN HAWAII .. on facebook, you should be able to reach out and give her an ear flick IMO.

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Peace and Quiet

Finally I think things are starting to settle down. It seems like life has been one non-stop whirlwind for the last month or so. Going back to before my Grandfather passed away, it has been one big drama or stress situation after another. But barring anything new coming down the pipe, I think we are finally back to our version of normal around here.

The kids are ready to head back to school on Tuesday. Well.. they are not READY, but they are prepared. I am READY for them to go back to school. It will be good for them to start putting their brains to use for something other than absorbing radiation from TVs and computer monitors. Both have started training for their fall sports. G is playing soccer in the club league and B is running cross country again this fall.

Work has finally settled down as well. After back to back major projects that we were woefully understaffed for and several VERY long weeks, we are hoping for some downtime around here as well. I finally got caught up on over two weeks of work orders that had to sit while we took care of these projects.

The weather has had a touch of fall already here and we haven't even hit Sept. yet. It has been a beautiful 65ish during the days and the evenings have been quite cool. I'll take this over the desert heat anyday!

Time to get through a Friday and get on with the weekend!

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If only..

If you haven't seen the new GI Joe movie.. well.. don't. It's horrible even if you happen to have nostalgia for the franchise as I did. The story wasn't good .. the choice of actors wasn't good. The dialog was painful in parts. Hell, when one of the Wayans brothers is a lead actor in the movie, that should be a red flag right there. The Baroness played by Sienna Miller was a nice perk, but not enough to save this atrocity of a movie.

The one redeeming quality of this movie however was the modified Hummer they were driving during one of the big chase scenes. One of the Joe's was hanging on to the top of the humvee while they were driving and in an attempt to remove him, they deployed this device from the front of the vehicle which is what I have been saying I want for my car for a long time. These big angled spikes dropped down from the front grill and they basically drove them into the back of the car in front of them and forced the car to flip up and over the top of the humvee. IT.. WAS... AWESOME!

All this came to mind again when I was driving home on the freeway the other day. It's 3 lanes wide where I was .. and the speed limit is 65.. which means we are all doing 74ish in the left lane. As we are cruising along I can see a cop in the median about half a mile ahead. Now I expect the usual "Oh Em Ghee! A Cop! Slow Down!" reaction and so eased off the gas myself. The lady in front of me however was apparently so concerned about her speed that she slowed down to FIFTY FUCKING TWO. 52!?! The speed limit is 65 .. which means he isn't even going to think about wasting his time for anything less than 70. So why the FUCK are you doing 52 in the fast lane on the freeway?

If I had that humvee at the time you would have seen that lady's car flipping over the roof as I spiked her retarded ass. Seriously.. what is wrong with people that they think the cop is suddenly going to disregard the fact that he's already gunned you doing 75 simply because you are now going 52 in the fast lane? If you are going to get pulled over.. then you are. Slamming on your brakes and driving like you are on a residential street suddenly only draws more attention to yourself, not to mention is a dangerous way to drive on the FREEWAY.

I thought about ramming her off the road and introducing her to Señor Shovel. My brother said I shouldn't do that in front of a cop, but given the fact that she was from IL and the fact that she was driving like jacktard, I think he would have either helped me or at the very least looked the other direction.

If you can't drive.. get off the road please. Road rage happens for a reason, and that reason is YOU.

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Busy, Busy

Normally I do my blogging in the quiet of morning at work. I can take a few minutes and knock out a post and it's something I enjoy doing to start the day. Lately however, it seems I am busy the minute I walk in the door. This has a lot to do with being in the middle of a couple of big projects while short 3 staff + one on reduced hours right now and one on FML for the next couple of weeks. That puts us 4-5 people short out of a staff of 13 to cover 18 hours a day x 7 days a week. Kinda thin to support a facility this size.

Why so short? We had one person transfer to another facility. We had one tech spot open from a chain of internal promotions. And then there was .. the incident. You know how you hear about creepy things on the news and you think to yourself 'Glad that is someone else dealing with that'? Well that was us suddenly dealing with it.

I was hesitant to blog about it and am still going to be cautious. Nothing I will put in here however will be not already be public record. You can see the details HERE in the public court document. I should really warn you now though... as a guy at work put it so well...once you read it, you can't unread it. So those of you who would rather not be aware of the sickness of some people, please skip that document.

How this all went down though was the interesting part of the story. It's not every day that you have armed officers from the County, State Dept. of Justice personell and Dept. of Homeland Security officals all show up to your place of work. We didn't have any details. All we knew is who they were talking too as he was isolated in an office and they were going through his office. Eventually we were given only the briefest of details that were required to take care of the security issues that we needed to as well as assist the invesitigators.

After the story hit the local papers and the charges became avail, we got a real picture of what was going on. It's quite disturbing to find out someone you have worked with for 5+ years is now being held on those kinds of charges. This guy was never my favorite person and I found his constant use of phrases like 'Hi Smiley', 'Welcome to my nightmare' and 'Are we having fun yet?' shovel worthy. Despite that, I never got that severely creepy vibe from him. I am not going to look back and be one of those people that will say they just KNEW something was not quite right about that guy.

We had a guy that used to work here that I was convinced was a mass murderer or possibly kept women in a pit in the basement of his house to make a skin suit or lampshades out of, but never have I had a suspicion that a coworker was a pedophile on a very disturbing level. Not that there is an acceptable level for that kind of thing, but lets just say that he was not oogling pics of high school chicks about to turn 18 or anything. If you want the full picture then read that document, just head my warning above.

So we have interviews today for techs, but even if we hire to fill the spots today, they won't start for a bit and then its at least 6 weeks to get them up to speed to where they can really contribute on their own here. So for the immediate future anyway, things will be very crazy around here and my posting will be sporadic.

Just as a warning to those of you who are not computer savvy.. they can and will find you if you are doing something stupid like that and those people DON'T fuck around. Hell this guy was in computers for a living and still got busted. Just don't go there.

So that this doesn't end up being a total downer post.. here are some more gems from the TFLN site:

(323): Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you

(602): Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.

(513): The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?

(864): Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.

(860): I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"

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It's one of those times...

I know I have been lax on the blogging lately. Not for lack of things to blog about by any means, more like an overwhelming list of things to blog about and just not the time or energy to do it.

Since I have last blogged I have driven to NY and back with my brother and sister-in-law to be with my family for my Grandfather's funeral. We left on a Friday morning and arrived on Saturday midday. We had enough time to get changed and have some lunch before the first viewing that afternoon. Sunday we had two more viewings and then the funeral was Monday morning with a reception afterwards. In between all the activity going on, we spent as much time together as a family as possible. I got to see and catch up with family that I haven't seen for many years as well as some that I get to see more often. The circumstances for the meeting were not great, but it was nice to see everyone again.

As if that were not enough to deal with, there have been a number of other things that have come up in the last couple of weeks. My ex's dog went missing while the boys were in AZ. She came home and the gate was open and her new puppy was gone. So the boys had to deal with that when they got back from the funeral. My parent's / brother's dog Timber had to be put down when they got back from the funeral in NY as well. My SO's father is having to have back surgery to deal with pain problems he is suffering from and that is causing her stress and worry. And most recently one of my closest friends is undergoing tests to try and get some answers to scary medical questions.

All in all.. I could use a week without anything major going on, but that will probably be a bit yet. On a positive note though, my brother-in-law is flying in on Thursday and as long as the weather is good, we are doing a guys trip to six flags on Friday and then we are going to relax and enjoy the weekend, probably catching the UFC fight on Saturday.

I have a blog topic I have yet to touch too involving a former PC tech where I work getting escorted from the property by several different branches of law enforcement including Dept. of Homeland Security. That is for another post though.

I hope this post finds the rest of you relatively drama free and happy. Hopefully things settle down for my family and friends soon too. Much Love all around.

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Careful what you text...

If you haven't been there yet, go to Texts From Last Night and start reading. Some of them are 'OMGIMCRYING' funny. Careful though...once you start reading you might look up and see that much time has gone bye.

Some great ones I have run across thus far:


(303): You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.


(217): we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.


(253): is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?


(209): update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
(1-209): the house was on fire??
(209): shit I thought I told you.


Just some great stuff there. Drunk texts.. its like when you drunk dial .. only you leave evidence behind. :P

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Crazy Weekend

It's been quite a whirlwind of a weekend, but given the choice I would definitely do it all over again. Friday at work I was just browsing around checking out some different music websites and as I was watching The Black Crowes on the projector at the time, I looked them up to see if they were going to play anywhere close in the near future. What I found was that they were indeed playing close and on that very night.

My brother and I drove down to the Waukesha fair and paid 9 bucks for admission and got to see the Crowes play live for close to 2 hours. I realized how long its been since I have seriously listened to them as I didn't recognize about 2/3s of the songs they played. They did do a couple of my favorites though including Hard To Handle, Thorn in My Pride and Wiser Time. Even the songs I didn't know were great. They still have that blues-rock sound and Chris Robinson has a great voice for it.

So that was Friday and on the way home my brother and I made plans to hang out the next day and we lamented the fact that we were not going to see Dave Matthews Band who were playing at Alpine Valley on Saturday and Sunday night. They are a favorite of both my brother and I. We had been looking for tickets, but came late to the game on that one and both shows were sold out. All the tickets we found for sale were 2-3x or more than face value.

Saturday I get a call from my brother saying he found a guy that had 2 extra lawn tickets for Sunday night that he was willing to sell to someone that could go for 50 bucks a piece.. did I want to go? HELL YES! So he made the arrangements. We hung out for the day and then I spent the evening with my SO.

After some minor issues with my car, my brother picked me up at the mechanic so we could head down and meet the guy with the tickets outside of Milwaukee. Everything was on the up and up and we had 2 lawn tickets. Gates didn't open to 530pm and it was only about 145 so we decided since neither of us had been there we would do a drive by on the venue so we knew where we needed to go and then we were going to get some food and chill for a bit.

That was the plan anyway. When we got down by Alpine Valley however, all the roads were being controlled and funneled by officers and before we knew it we were in the parking lot. We were hoping we could drive out the other side.. but nope. It was one way in.. no way out. Suddenly we were parked amid a ton of people unpacking their tailgating gear. On a whim I had thrown a couple of those camping chairs in the back of my bro's car 'just in case'. Well I am glad we did as at least we had a place to sit. We had about half a bottle of soda each left from the drive down.. and yeah.. that was it. Really were not prepared at all for tailgating.

We hung out and took stock of Alpine Valley while we waited for the gates to open. When they did we grabbed some overpriced food as we were starving and found some seats on the grass. At 7pm Umphrey's McGee opened the show and they were a great band to listen too. At about 830 Dave and crew took the state and flat out destroyed the place. Tim Reynolds has been touring with them this summer as well as Jeff Coffin from Bela Flek on the sax and Rashawn Ross on trumpet.

The setlist was:

Dave Matthews Band 7-19-2009, Alpine Valley Music Theatre, East Troy, WI
Preshow: Umphrey's McGee opened.
Set 1: Proudest Monkey, Satellite, Squirm, Pig, Shake Me Like A Monkey, You Never Know, Crash Into Me, The Dreaming Tree, You and Me, Funny The Way It Is, Gravedigger, Alligator Pie, Out of My Hands, #41, Rhyme and Reason, Dive In, Jimi Thing, Time Bomb, Two Step
Encore: Thank You, Halloween

They played all the songs I was really hoping to hear off the new album as well as some of my older favorites. Gravedigger was awesome as was Crash. I will tell you though, what really set the show off was #41. Jeff Coffin on sax and Carter on the drums....just flat out unbelievable. The song must have been close to 25 minutes long with some of the most incredible jams I have ever heard. Two-step was in that same ballpark as was Jimi Thing.

The arena was like a big sing-along dance party with 40,000 people. It was an amazing experience and we are already making plans for next years shows at Alpine Valley. We got out of the show around midnight and were home around 2am. All worth it for an amazing evening.

There are some pics from the show up on my facebook page, so look for them there if you would like to see them.

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Shockingly Bland

Last night my SO and I went to see a band called Cowboy Mouth at the Majestic in Madison. I was quite happy that the sound was much better this time and the show was a blast. The opening act Sunspot, which is a local Madison band, was great as well. You can check out their song Prozac Girl here:



As we were waiting for Cowboy Mouth to come on and they were doing the stage changes, we were looking around the audience from our balcony perch. Down front, right by the state was a pair that I just couldn't figure out. The older woman looked like Ma Clampett from the Beverly Hillbillies and the younger 'person' (she was very 'Pat' in that we couldn't tell if she was male or female) was so emo that I wanted to cut myself on her/his behalf. It was positively oozing teen drama. I have to assume it was over 21 though since it was drinking Bud Select.. from a can. Bleh.

Anyway.. in the crowd also was a punk rocker type.. chick with shaved sides of her head and the rest of the hair in a blonde and flourescent pink mohawk on the top of her head. She looked ready to do some serious rockin. Cowboy Mouth takes the stage and they are just rockin the place. Heavy drums and killer baseline.. they are overloaded with energy and totally getting the crowd into the show.

Well, all except those two. The rest of the crowd was jammin along.. but the two that went way out of their way to stand out from the crowd and show how in touch with their emo / punk sides they are and make a point of being right up by the stage looked like rigamortis had set in. Maybe they were having a statue contest that I wasn't aware of. The one to show least emotion gets a free Bud Lime! Maybe thats what it was.

Ma Clampett was singing along to a few songs, but the two angsty ones didn't move a muscle through 90 minutes of loud, fun, rockin songs. Not even a foot tap lest they be thrown out of the 'disgruntled post-teen whiny bitches society'.

But it was a great show with tons of energy .. here is a clip of what these guys are like live.



Although the bass player they had last night was far crazier than the one in the video. She was a little asian chick on crack.

So if you have made it this far into the post.. congrats. You have just finished reading my 200th post. Who woulda thought? I feel like I should make a speech here about all the laughter and the tears we have shared over the years....but if thats what you think is going to happen here, then you really haven't been paying attention all along. Instead, to celebrate, I think we should all grab our shovels and go take over the front row at a RF concert and see how many shovels to the face they can take before they stop playing!

/cheers all

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PBR and Bud Lime and Coeds Oh My!

So last night my SO and I went to see a show at the Majestic down in Madison. Small theater.. maybe 300 people or so. Standing room only, but they had a full bar close bye so at least if you had to stand for 4 hours you could get beer easily. Now this theater is right at the end of State St. in downtown Madison, which is basically the UW campus.

The guy we went to see is not newer on the scene and I expected it to be a younger crowd, but with the exception of the couple that was probably my parents age that were not to far from us, it was pretty much wall to wall college kids. I felt rather old .. and I suppose I am over a decade older than a 21yr old college kid.

This bar had about 12 beers on tap plus a large selection of stuff in cans and bottles. You would think that with all those selections maybe people would get some decent stuff to drink. They had Guinness, Capitol Amber (local brew which is quite good) among many others. Yet the majority of them were walking arounds with 16oz cans of Pabst Blue Ribbon and some Bud Light with Lime concoction. No.. I don't mean they had a wedge of lime with their Bud, it's actually some kind of flavored beer.

What they really need to do with Bud Light if they are going to flavor it is.. well.. give it some actual beer flavor. That would be a start in the right direction. :P

The opening act was very good. Erin McCarley was her name. Very talented. Was just her and a guy on the keyboards. If you know who Regina Spektor is, she reminds me of her.. just add an acoustic guitar. Check out this video to get a feel for her sound.. definitely worth a listen. VID HERE

It was pretty much the first time I have seen Mat Kearney. He and his band are very good and the concert was fun. The sound system there at the Majestic was unfortunately not very well tuned to their sound and while I know some will mock me for being too old, its really more of an audiophile thing. I like to be able to understand the lyrics, I want to hear the notes of the guitar solo. The rythym of the song was moving at that volume, but unfortunately high notes or busy sections of the songs were just reduced to feeback filled noise. It was not that it was loud that was the problem, it reminded me of someone who takes a cheap home stereo, cranks the treble to full and then turns it up far louder than the rig can handle. It lost so much sound quality on the vocals and the melodies that I at one point wished he would just stop singing so I could at least enjoy the music.

Fortunately, towards the end of the show they seems to have dialed him in a bit more and he did more songs with the acoustic guitar / piano and it was much better. I really enjoyed the last few songs he did and he got the crowd involved. It was a lot of fun.

The best part though was the drummer. If you have ever seen the movie 'Knocked Up' or "Strange Wilderness" you will know who I am talking about when I say the dark haired skinny stoner guy. As soon as he came on stage, I thought to myself that he looked just like that guy and later on in the show I leaned in and yelled that fact into J's ear and she said she had the exact same thought when she first saw him. Anyway, it was fun to watch this guy play the drums:



Speaking of drumming though.. I stumbled across a couple of clips from Carter Beuford who is the drummer for Dave Matthews Band. He put out a DVD called 'Under the Table and Drumming' and it is pretty amazing to watch him play. Check out the rythyms he is knocking out in 'Tripping Billies' .... just incredible.

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Oh the drama...

Every now and then my otherwise well behaved boys remind me that they are indeed still children despite the fact that they are fun to hang out with now at their age. Case in point yesterday.. G decided that what I had asked him to do was well above and beyond what any mortal 11 year old should be asked to do.

I know what you are thinking.. I must have asked him to reroof the house. Or maybe I asked him to cure cancer. Surely it must have been some kind of request that was just too damn much for an 11 year old to handle. Had you seen the argumentative fit that quickly turned into tears and then a look like I had beaten him with an old belt for an hour or two...you would have assumed that my request was THAT monumentous.

My request however was simply that he clean the kitchen. Something he does on a regular basis. However, it wasn't HIS turn according to him. And it wasn't. There is a system and a pattern and it technically wasn't his turn. However, I asked him to do it anyway and while I didn't expect him to be happy about it, the emotional drama that ensued was absurd.

So, my younger son and I sat down and had a little chat. I reminded him that while he sits home all day during the summer enjoying computers and xbox's and wii's and mp3 players and tv and bikes and going out with friends, he is actually asked to do very little in return. They are occasionaly responsible for cleaning the kitchen and they have to clean their room. Every now and then they have to mow the lawn. Thats pretty much it. Cleaning their room is not even enforced that often and most of the time it looks like a tornado passed through right after someone dropped a couple of hand grenades in there.

So, after reminding him how many things he COULD be doing during the day to help out around the house, he smartly decided that it would not be too much to ask of him to clean the kitchen even though it was not his turn. See.. its all about perspective. He even came up and apologized for being a drama queen over the whole thing. Maybe there is hope for him yet!

I get to go see a show tonight for the first time in a long time. I love live music. If its live acoustic music, even better. If its also in a small venue, then its perfect. Really looking forward to it. I have never seen Mat Kearney, but my SO really likes him and he seems to be in the Jack Johnson / Josh Kelley vein so I am sure I will enjoy his music.

My family is flying in on Thursday and I can't wait to see them all. Bring your winter clothes Mom. It was 54 on my way into work this morning. :P

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This is why I love WI

I know I have been quiet lately.. but things have just been plugging along that I haven't just had a 'wow I should blog about that' kind of moment lately. Last week I was finishing up a lot of the details that go with moving and getting settled into the new place so I didn't even have my PC hooked up for a while.

It was miserable last week.. in the 90s and humid. There were about 4 days in there that it was just downright unpleasant to be outside. It was like Arizona where you just stay inside in the air conditioning. However, the reason I love WI so much is that after a couple of days in the sweltering heat, it cools back down. Yesterday and again today we are talking a high in the low 70s. Cool, overcast and a nice breeze. It just doesn't get any better than that. It was 55 as I left the house for work this morning. I love it.

The boys are enjoying summer break so far and I haven't heard too many 'I'm bored's yet. They have a wood carving class they enjoy on mondays and most days they go bowling with friends. The local bowling alley gives out passes for those students who get all A's and B's that allow them one free game of bowling every single day during the summer so they like to walk down and meet up with their friends in the afternoon for a game. Other than that.. they are your typical teen/pre-teen. They have to be reminded they have to shower even on summer days and they like to lounge around watching TV and playing computer / xbox / wii etc.

We are slated to go see Transformers 2 tonight, providing B is feeling up to it. We were going to go for Father's day weekend, but alas it didn't come out til the following Wed. Imax here we come. Hopefully. :)

I stumbled across another band that has just blown me away. Their sound is very hard to nail down.. soul, blues, some funk and other influences as well. Give it a listen. Amazing feeling in their songs. The band is called Mofro.. sometimes JJ Grey & Mofro. Here is a song called "The Sun is Shining Down"



And since those of you that know me well know that I absolutely love acoustic music and versions of songs.. I found a solo acoustic version of JJ Grey doing this song. Its simple and stripped down and still incredible. He has a very soulfull voice..

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Crazy game of poker

I don't know if any of you ever listen to the station called Jam On.. but they play some awesome improvisational "jam bands" such as Phish, Dave Matthews Band, Gov't Mule etc. This morning they played a song by a band I had heard of only in passing. I actually had a vesion of No Woman, No Cry by them, but this morning I heard 'Crazy Game of Poker' by OAR. These guys are amazing.

Give their song a listen. Its long .. so its in two parts. I know those of you who are somewhat afraid of the interwebs will probably pass or its just too much work to listen for 15 minutes, but believe me, its worth it.



PT. 2




Really.. give it a listen. Great stuff. If you don't like it, its probably because you are a communist or have had too many brain cells turned to mush from listening to Rascall Flats. I have been trying to warn people of the long term consequences of listening to that craptacular shitfest known as Rascall Flats, but some people just won't listen.

I say Of.. you say A.. Revolution

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Bleh...

90+ degrees. Sunny. Humid. This is the kind of weather that we get a couple weeks of in the summer time and I hate it. Its unpleasant to be outside. You can take a shower, get dressed and then you step outside and feel like you need another. BLEH.

For Father's Day the boys and I went to the movies to see the new Star Trek. I had big plans originally to go see the new Transformers on the Imax, but then I came to the realization that it doesn't actually release til Thursday of this week. So we went to Star Trek instead. Now I am not a Trekkie by any means and normally avoid the Star Trek movies, this one was done by JJ Abrahms and looked to be a restart to the franchise much like Batman Begins and The Dark Knight were to the Batman franchise. While it wasn't as good as the batman movies in my opinion, it was entertaining and overall I would say it was well done.

Yesterday I went to see 'The Taking of Pelham 123" with my brother and his father-in-law. It was a great flick. I like the complex heist type movies. This one had Travolta as the bad guy in it. As we were leaving, my brother said that while he is not normally bothered by profanity in a movie, this seemed over the top to him. I thought about it a minute and while I didn't agree that it was over the top, what bothered me is that it felt forced. Either the dialogue was just that poorly written, or Travolta couldn't quite pull off the super-badass-I-was-in-prison attitude. Sometimes it was ok.. but some of his tirades just felt like such a stretch for him. He is normally a good actor in my opinion, but this was definitely not his best role.

The boys and I, my brother and SIL and her parents all enjoyed happy hour together out at TGIFridays last night. It was a good time and it was a pleasure to get a chance to visit with her parents who are visiting from CA.

Stay cool everyone.

Big props to whoever invented air conditioning!

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MVNG!

I had to figure out how to turn the word moving into a 4 letter word.. so thats what I came up with. I have a lot of respect for people who move people for a living. I will tell you one thing though. The next time my brother tells me he is moving, he better also tell me that he is getting single story, ground floor apartment or he is getting a swift kick to the junk.

Here in WI we have had an amazingly awesome summer thus far. We have only had a couple of days where it has been over 80 and no really humid days. Most of the last couple of months the temp has been in the high 60s to low 70s which is perfect. I just knew however that when my brother said he wanted help moving on the 15th that it would be hot and humid. Forget complex weather forcasting models, just pick a day to move a whole ass-ton of furniture up stairs and you can pretty much plan on hot, sticky weather.

Not only is my brother's new apartment an upstairs unit, it has a loft with a small narrow staircase to get up there. Did I also mention that the doorway into his unit was as far as it could possibly be from any of the parking lots so we got to wheel and/or carry everything on a small hike before you could even start the joy that is stairs?

My brother and SIL helped me move some stuff around as well and all in all it was two days of backbreaking hell. So I have changing MOVING to MVNG as it is truly a four letter word in my book. I don't like moving my own shit.. I can't imagine moving other peoples shit for a living. My hat is off to those professional movers that do that day in and day out.

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Ungrateful

I had an odd experience when I was out with my brother and SIL the other night that has been kind of eating at me the last few days and I feel compelled to share with you now. It began with an epic journey to try and score some Ben & Jerry's Oatmeal Cookie Chunk ice cream.


The only location was downtown on State Street. There technically is one in the airport, but as it is behind the security checkpoint, it really doesn't count. So we make the journey downtown, park the car, put money in the meter and set off to find us some ice cream. We pass Cold Stone and head further down State. My brother has the address and after a quick look at the building numbers ASSURES us that we are headed in the right direction. After a few minutes of walking and ending up at the end of State St. and no Ben and Jerry's in sight I check the addresses for myself and realize we have been going the wrong direction the whole time. That's what I get for trusting the PILOT with the GPS NAV on his phone. /sigh

We turned around and walked all the way back up State St. As we were walking there was a guy shaking his container with change in it and asking for money from everyone walking bye. I was talking with my brother at this time and not paying attention as we walked bye but my SIL was listening and she was shocked as the guy was apparently yelling at people who were not giving him money and even said something along the lines of "Well fuck you then." when we passed him without putting something in his jar. I was shocked, but let it go and we moved on.

We made it all the way to the other end of State St. and found the address. There was the sign, but there was nothing inside. Apparently it had closed recently. The building was up for lease. /sigh. So while I mocked my brother for leading us on a 20 minuted wild goose chase for nothing, we headed back to Cold Stone so we didn't have to go home without something to show for our efforts. My SIL and I got out little servings of ice cream and my brother gets some nasty cotton candy flavored milk shake.. bleh.

It was nice outside, so we decide to sit on the benches outside and enjoy the weather and the atmosphere of the area which is right in the middle of the UW campus. As we are sitting there enjoying our ice cream, a gentleman walks up to us and at first I assume he is just being friendly and we chit chat for a minute before he launches into his spiel. He tells this story about how he just bought a foot long sub at subway, ate half and was saving the other half for later and was just trying to get home, but didn't have enough money for the bus. It was a long and involved story and at the end, he of course asks for money. My brother is sitting across from me and graciously pulls out his wallet and gives the guy a buck.

Now if you are asking for money and someone gives you money.. one would think you would be at least a little bit grateful right? Not this guy. He starts going on about how that a buck isn't enough to catch the bus ride home and does he have any more money? He then turns to me and TELLS me that I must have money I can give him. I told him that I wasn't going to give him any money. He gets really indignant now and there is anger in his voice. However, he does finally leave.

I know.. I am a heartless bastard that doesn't help those in need. Well let me paint a picture for you. This guy was dressed in pressed khaki pants. A pressed button down shirt. A leather type jacket and an nice pair of sunglasses. He was clean and well groomed. He had on nice shoes. There were no stains on his clothes. This was not a guy that was sleeping on the street.

So maybe he is down on his luck like a lot of people are these days. I tell you what. If I only have 5 bucks to my name, and there have been weeks where that has been the case, I make sure that I buy gas for my car first and foremost so I can get where I need to go. I don't go out for dinner at subway. So here is a well dressed guy who just told me he spent his last 5 bucks on a footlong at Subway, but is now getting pissed and because my brother and I won't pay for a bus ride for him? Maybe you should have bought the 6 inch sub and had enough to get home. Or maybe you should have bought a loaf of bread and some peanut butter and had sandwiches for a few days and STILL had enough to get a bus ride home.

In this time period in our country I don't think anyone is unaware people are struggling. That people are hurting and there are many situations where people suddenly do need help. My problem with this situation was his attitude and the decisions he was making. If I was stuck downtown and needed bus fare to get home and had to go ask people to spare some change, I would sure as hell be humble and grateful for ANYTHING someone gave me. Only have a quarter in your pocket? THANK YOU. You have a dollar that you are willing to give me in exchange for nothing? THANK YOU.

This guy felt like we owed him something. He felt that he was being done an injustice because we weren't giving him more money. My brother is more patient and gracious than I am because after that little ungrateful outburst, I would have told him to give me my dollar back. Ungrateful sonofabitch. If someone holds a door for me, I say thank you and am grafetul they did. This guy is asking for free money and doesn't have the common decency to at least pretend to be appreciative? Fuck you then. Oh .. and the bus that you were 'waiting' for just stopped and you didn't get on even though I watched several other people hand you money. Guess it wasn't that important for you to get home after all was it?

I know it seems like I am a callous prick, but in a time when everyone is struggling and cutting back and trying to make ends meet, acting as he did when someone is trying to help him just floors me.

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Seriously?

My brother and I often get together on Mondays as I have the day off and he does fairly often as well. We usually grab lunch, watch a movie or two and lately we have been doing happy hour after my sister-in-law gets off work. This week we were at Friday's where they have 1/2 price apps and taps during happy hour. We usually get a few appetizers to share and this week was no exception. We have tried most of them on the menu, but this week we decided to try the nachos.

What comes to mind when you think nachos? A big plate of chips .. with melted nacho cheese on them. Sometimes other toppings as well. So Friday's menu description says that theirs comes with 'bacon–infused refried beans, spicy nacho meat and cheese'. Now my brother and I weren't too keen on the refried beans so we asked if we could get the nachos with just the meat and nacho cheese. We were told the beans and meat were a mix and so no, they couldn't do that. After some discussion, we decided to try them anyway and got that mix on the side for my SIL as she wanted it.

After waiting, our big plate of nachos came. Chips piled high with melted nacho cheese! Oh.. wait. WTF is this crap?

Seriously.. W T F is that? Oh.. I'm sorry, I thought we ordered NACHOS. I know we are in Wisconsin and all and we are not exactly bordering Mexico or anything, but Fridays is a national chain and surely you can afford to send someone to research what the hell nachos are supposed to be. Really.. if you ran out of nachos, then come out and tell me you are out of nachos. Don't russle up some stale taco shells and break them in half and then melt some co-jack cheese on top and try to pass them off as nachos gringo!

If you decide to go to Fridays for appetizers, stay away from the not-so-nachos. If you want to recreate the experience for free at home, then just leave 4 hard taco shells out on the counter for a few days and let them get nice and stale. Then break them in half, melt some cheese on top making sure its not actualy spicy nacho cheese as that might get too close to real nachos. Then put them on a plate and scoop some baby food pees into a pile in the middle and call it guacamole. Voila! You have Fridays 'nachos' of your very own!

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The roof .. the roof..

....is apparently on fire. Actually, the whole place has burned right to the ground. I'm of course referring to the Grand View Topless Coffee Shop in Vassalboro, Maine. The entire building was destroyed, including the families living quarters that were attached to the back. State fire officials have confirmed it was arson.

I understand that some people may oppose a topless coffee shop. I get that some uptight people are probably quite uncomfortable with the concept. However, this is one of those cases where those people need to get the fuck over themselves and either deal, or move the hell away.

Someone was so offended by this 'atrocity' that they decided it was ok for them to take the law into their own hands and burn it to the ground. Nevermind the fact that it was a popular business that employed 14 people. Nevermind the fact that the owner, his two daughters, their boyfriends and 2 grandkids were all asleep in the attached living are when the arsonist set the place ablaze. Luckily an ambulance crew returning from another call noticed the blaze and were able to wake the family and get them out safely.

Just when you think we are making progress as a society something like this rears its head. What kind of message does this send? The topless human form is a horrible thing, but setting someone elses property and business on fire and possibly killing 7 people is ok if you REALLY don't like something. Good game. If they catch the arsonist, I say that he/she should be forced to watch as his home is burned down while hedonistic topless people dance around around it cheering. Then, they should shave off his nipples like they guy from Pink Floyd's The Wall since nipples apparently are offensive to him. I wouldn't want him suffering emotional distress when he looks in the mirror!

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I'll get right on that!

We have a department here at work that I won't mention by name, but let's just say it rhymes with Shmurveillance. Now this is a department you would expect to be on the ball. On top of things. They are technically one of the 'watchdogs'. They should be aware of whats going on and be proactive and all that jazz. Right?!?

Due to regulations here, we are not allowed to replicate certain data to our hot site unless there is a camera there that is monitored by said department here. It can't be monitored by security at the remote site, it HAS to be monitored from here to be in compliance. So this presented a bit of new situation for the department and so we have been working with them to come up with a viable solution to this problem.

Now, this situation first came up close to 2 years ago.. and we have been working/fighting with them since. We finally got some equipment onsite in January of this year. When they brought it up, I questioned the purchase and if they actually had everything they needed. They bought the camera and one signal converter. I asked them "Don't you need another signal converter on this end to get it back to what you use in your system?" Queue up the quizzical looks and head scratching. /sigh

So they agreed to go back and research it with the company. Apparently 'research it' meant 'forget about it for an extended period of time and hopefully it will go away'. This phrase, 'research it', was much like an old supervisor of mine using the phrase 'let's tag-team this' which really meant 'you do it and I'll take credit'. It's all about knowing the language I guess.

Anyway, in this extended time period that we have been waiting for this camera install, that same department insists on sending EVERY work request up to us with "URGENT" or "ASAP" or "EXPEDITE" all over it. Oh the irony. It's that whole scratch-my-back-i'll-scratch-yours thing. Only they seem to want a back scratch, then a massage, and even a happy ending to boot and are not willing to even look at our backs in return.

In this vein, I stumbled across some new office words that I found helpful to know the definition of:

Blamestorming - A group discussion of why a deadline was missed or a project failed and who was responsible.

Glazing - Corporate-speak for sleeping with your eyes open; a popular pastime at conferences and early-morning meetings. “Didn’t he notice that by the second session half the room was glazing?”

Percussive Maintenance - The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it to work again.

Salmon Day - The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed in the end. “God, today was a total salmon day!”

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And so it begins...

I knew the day would come, as my boys get older, that they would push things further and further. Until this morning, I knew when my boys said they were sick, that they were sick. Like about to puke up a lung sick. Sick to the point where it would not be a good idea for them to be in school. They are at an age where they are self diagnosing these kinds of conditions. I have to take their word for it.

Up to this point, it hasn't been an issue. This morning however, I saw the first signs of a budding Ferris Bueler. See yesterday B went to Six Flags Great America down near Chicago on a school trip. They left school early in the morning, made the 2.5 hour drive down and then spent all day in the park. Then they got back on the bus for the drive back and arrived at the school late in the evening. He was exhausted I could tell. That combination of travel and having spent all day yelling and being excited as he rode roller coasters and having a blast being a teenager with his friends.

This morning he was up at 5am like usual. Yes, its HIS choice to set an alarm to get up that early. As I was getting ready I hear a knock on the door and B comes in and tells me that he doesn't 'feel good' in his best whiny, feel-sorry-for-me voice. I looked at him and he wouldn't look me straight in the eye and I knew it was bullshit.

I got to explain that what he was feeling is normal and frankly, it's life. If he makes a choice for a long busy day on a Thursday, then he has to deal with getting up for school the next morning. I explained that how he was feeling was how most people feel going to work EVERY day and that he had to suck it up. He set his alarm for a later time and went back to bed.

Now begins the waiting game. When am I going to get the call from the attendance secretary at the school wondering why my child has been absent NINE TIMES. Unfortunately for him, I have seen Ferris Bueler. Many times.

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Big Whiskey and the GrooGrux King

I know not all of you are on facebook, so I thought I would post the link here as well. You can go HERE and listen to the new Dave Matthews Band album. You can't download it, but you can listen to it as many times as you like.

I have listened to it all the way through a couple of times and I must say I am quite impressed. I was a little dissapointed with their last studio release as I felt it was very 'pop-y'. I didn't like the direction they had gone with their sound as much on that record. This album returns to much more of their blues, jazz and rock roots. It has a bit heavier feel than some of their other albums. The sound is thicker.. it reminds me more of the song 'Don't Drink the Water' off the album Before These Crowded Streets.

There are some tracks with killer horns. I was wondering how they would handle the passing of LeRoi and how that would factor into the amount of focus they have on brass sounds in their music. It was always a big part of their sound and I think it would have changed them too much had they departed from it entirely.

Overall, I am extremely impressed. The sound is tight, solid and BIG. The songs have great energy to them for studio tracks. I can only imagine how these are going to translate into amazing jams when played live.

To commemorate the occasion, here are a couple of my favorite live performances from DMB. There are countless incredible live vids out there, so it was hard to choose.

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Math Skillz

As a parent, you know that your kids are going to excel at some things and possibly struggle with others. You hope that they are good students. Both my boys do very well in school, but they are polar opposites on what they like and easily excel in. My older son is definitely more on the reading / writing side of things while my younger son is the math / science junkie. Now that is not to say either 'struggles' with the other subjects, but they both definitely have something that seems to just come naturaly to them.

Attending my older son's music performance last night for choir set my mind at ease on his math skills however. I could go into some long dissertation on how music IS math, but that is really not my point. I was able to simply look at him up on stage and I knew he had a firm grip on statistics, ratios and even probability.

How did I know he had a firm grip on these concepts simply by observing him standing up on stage and singing? Easy. There were about 30 kids up there performing with the seventh grade choir. Five, including himself, were guys. What can I say but SMART KID.

The performance was awesome and we had a great evening with friends and family. We grilled brats and dogs for dinner and then went to watch B perform. Then back to the house for some awesome desserts. It was a good time all around.

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Music Friday

I stumbled across 2 amazing live performances from Jason Mraz this morning so I thought I would share them here. The great thing about this guy is that he sounds just as good live with limited production value behind him as he does on studio records. The second has a bit of a intro to it, but trust me, wait through it for the song to start. It's well worth it. Jason Mraz is doing a show with G. Love and Special Sauce in Minneapolis August 20th. Road trip anyone?

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Where's the pole?

So what happens when you cross big red balls, a 30 foot pole, temporary blindness and a young alaskan woman who announces she has never been kissed because she doesn't want to make out with anyone from her home town because they are all related? Good TV. That's what you get. If anyone of you reading this remember the host of the old E! show called talk soup John Henson, he is now one of the hosts of the show called Wipeout on ABC.



The show itself is hilarious with people doing stupid things for a shot at fifty grand. Its humor is only magnified by John Henson making endless cracks on the contestants and the abuse they take on the course. If you haven't seen it yet, you can go to abc.com and check out a couple of full episodes on there. But here is a clip with all the mentioned components in it.




Enjoy!

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Sam!

4:38am.....

SAM!

SAM!

SAM! W.T.F. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?!?

SAM YOU FUCKER! DON'T YOU CALL ME AND THEN NOT COME OUT! WHAT DO YOU THINK NOW FUCKER?!? SAAAAAAMMMM!


At this point I have woken up enough to realize that its not my alarm going off. At first through my sleep addled fog, I thought the noise was some really bad radio dj 'prank' that I was hearing. It was not. After a 20 seconds of this irate yelling and me getting my wits about me enough to comprehend what was going on I managed something along the lines of:

I don't know who you are.. but get your crazy drunk ass away from my window!


I would imagine my rather angry and gravely morning voice coming out my window sobered her up some and maybe freaked her out because she said nothing else after that and took off.

Needless to say, it was not how I wanted to start off my morning. I guess that is the downside to being fairly close to a bar and having ground floor windows. Though this was the first time I have ever had someone yelling in my window. At least she waited until it was close to time for me to get up I suppose. :P

I did end up making it into work early this morning though.. so maybe I should thank crazy drunk bitch? Nahhhhh.. get the hell away from my window before I get the shovel!

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Fitting

I saw this shirt today and thought of my poor sister who before long will have two toddlers running around.



I often get into the discussion with people about why I don't want to have any more kids. That right there is one of those reasons. :P I like my kids being old enough and for the most part wise enough, to not break things randomly around the house. Not to say it never happens, but the frequency compared to when they were little is much more tolerable.

Just remember.. those Best Buy warranties even cover accidental damage! :P

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A tragedy.

My brother and I decided to watch a movie when we were both off on Monday. After starting to watch a movie that was so bad we turned it off after less than 10 minutes, we decided to watch 'How to Lose Friends and Alienate People'. The movie stars Simon Pegg (from Shaun of the Dead), Meagan Fox (as G would say Haaawt!), and Kirsten Dunst (seriously.. how is she STILL getting movie roles?).

Now normally I would have to skip the movie on general principal since she was in it but it started off ok. She was an ugly, stuck-up bitch who no one liked and I had a feeling she was going to die a horrible death in this movie. I had this glimmer of home that Simon Pegg would treat her like a Zombie from Shaun of the Dead and decapitate that fugly troll. Then throw in the fact that you have Megan Fox there as the hot chick that he is pursuing to counter-balance said hideous harpy's negative impact on the film, and I was actually optomistic. Key word being WAS.

*Spoiler Alert*

How this movie unfolded however was nothing as glorious as it should have been. Quite the opposite. This film turned into a tragedy the likes of which I have never seen. Its a good thing we were watching this at my brothers house for a couple of reasons. First off, I didn't throw anything at the screen as I didn't want to break his TV and second, I didn't get us kicked out of a theater from yelling my disgust at the sheer retardedness of the movies plot.

To be fair, its not the plot that was really the problem. The plot was decent even if a bit on the predictable side. The problem was, the plot was ruined when IT was cast to play the other female lead. See the problem was that in the end, Pegg's character realizes that fame and money aren't everything and that he doesn't really want Megan Fox. He decides that he wants that billy-goat-eating, lives-under-the-bridge, soul-sucking-hideous-hosebeast of a woman.

This plot would have worked fine had hosebeast's role been filled with pretty much anyone else. Eliza Dushku would have been an excellent choice for example. I would have certainly bought that he gave up a chance to have sex with Megan Fox to chase after her instead. But Nooooo! He is going after .. that... thing. WTF? How am I supposed to buy into this movie? I'm all for suspending belief at the movies, but even I have my limits. C'mon!

You could have put in the monster from Alien in Dunst's role and I would have had less of a struggle with it. It still wouldn't have made much sense to skip sex with Fox, but it still would have made more sense than him chasing after Dunst. If you put me in a room with Dunst and the Alien, with her acidic skin desolving saliva, razor sharp teeth and claws, huge chip on her shoulder and all and told me I had to try to have sex with one of them, I would tell Alien to pucker up buttercup. I would rather have my unit disolved off with acidic spit as she disembowled me than have to interact with that other hosebeast.

Everyone knows JarJar Binks is the most annoying character on the planet and everyone wants to see him killed violently, but I would even rather have him wandering around the movie and Pegg's character trying to hook up with him than pursuing Dunst.

Overall I felt what could have been a decent movie was ruined completely by one bad casting call. Really.. HOW is she still getting roles? HOW? Was Babe the Pig not available? Barney the dinosaur? Shaq in his Shazzam outfit? Any of those would still have been far superior choices.

Really.. we are supposed to believe he went after:



instead of:




Maybe the real hero of this story is Simon Pegg because it is a testament to his incredible acting ability to pull off that role. I mean he was able, with a straight face and only a few dry heaves, act like he wanted to leave Megan to go slay the beast after Dunst. Kudos to you Simon. You have conquered your Everest. You have proven your versitality and ability to act even under the harshest of conditions. Next time though.. do me a favor and demand a different actress to work with. She will eat your soul when you aren't looking!

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Say what?

So we were all set to grill up some venison steaks for dinner last night with my brother and SIL when my son reminded me that we had promised that the next time we were all together, we would go to Buffalo Wild Wings and split an order of the 'Blazin' wings. This is the very top of their hotness scale and has this warning on it: "Keep away from eyes, pets and children." Now we had tried their 'Hot' a while back and that was pretty intense itself. Blazin is another 3 notches above that.

As we were heading into the restaurant, my younger son turns to show me how one of his adult teeth was coming in faster than another. His older brother asks him how he remembers when the second one was lost to know that its coming in faster. The converstaion at this point was:

G: "Don't you remember when Mom punched me in the balls and I lost this tooth?"

B: "Oh yeah! I remember that!"

Me: "Wait.. what?!?"


No, you concerned people do not need to call child protective services. The story was that G had picked up a big excercise ball and had been carrying it around asking if anyone thought it was weird that one of his balls was bigger than the other. Typical shennanigans from him and then mom apparently dropped down to 5th grade level (as I would have) and punched the big 'ball'. This somehow coincided with his tooth coming out.. or at least close enough that G has the ability now to tell the story about mom punching him in the balls and causing a tooth to come out. Mom packs quite a wallop!

So after that story.. I am already laughing as we head in and get out table. Brandon has this ring that he wears which my SIL noticed and commented on. Now B wears it on his right ring finger as he knows it signifies marriage on the left. It was also fairly loud in there, so I think he missed part of the question asked of him. This led to the following very amusing exchange:

SIL: Thats a cool ring B. Looks like its made of Tungsten. Same as J's wedding ring.

J: Heh.. who are you married to B?

B: It's my right hand!

It took a lot of effort not to make a new distance record for shooting soda out of a nasal passage. In clarifying .. B was trying to say that the ring was ON his right hand and thus didn't signify marriage. But the way it all went down.. well that is just priceless. SIL was quite proud that she got the joke this time right away though and for once, I was surprised in that it went over both my boys' heads. Nowadays I am usually shocked how all those little innuendos don't go over their head and the two of them are giggling away.

The big adventure for the night was splitting an order of those wings. 2 each for B, J and I. We had extra drinks on hand. Ranch to dip them in. We were set. We ate them quick before the first one completely hit and we had a chance to rethink things. It wasn't bad at first, but about 60 seconds later the burn started. The back of the throat felt much like battery acid was slowly burning a hole right through to the outside. We tried out best to quench things, but it was a good 10-15 minutes of sweating, red faces, watery eyes, runny noses and burning in the mouth and throat.

We managed to complete our little challenge although I doubt we will ever do that again. The waitress was telling us about the challenge they have with those wings that will get you a picture up on the board. You have to eat 12 of them. By yourself. In under 6 minutes. With NO drinks or other food inbetween. Insanity IMO. On top of that, while they will take your picture for free and put it up on the board, you still have to pay for the wings and if you want the T-shirt proving you did it.. you have to pay for that too. What kind of crazy food challenge is that? I'm going to skip the whole paying to torture myself bit thanks. Paying for the 6 we split between us was bad enough. :P

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Happy Mother's Day!

To all the mothers out there who do amazing things for their children, I just want to wish you a happy mother's day.

I wish I could be there to celebrate with you today Mom, but I am glad I was there a week ago to see you. You will be in my thoughts today!

Love you Mom.

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And the stupidity continues..

People never cease to amaze me. Recently we have had users whining or in a panic about the fact that their new computer.. built all shiny and fresh in 2009, doesn't have a floppy drive in it. A FLOPPY disk drive. That is like saying I won't take that new stereo system with the 100 disk CD changer, digital tuner with HDMI ports and 5.1 surround sound because it lacks an 8-track player. Or walking into the store and trying to pick up a cellular phone, but telling them you will only take it if you can get one with a rotary dialer. Wake up and join the rest of us in the digital age.

For this desktop transition I made a temporary server for users to copy their music too. Technically speaking, if its not business related, its not supposed to be on a work PC. However, because we are nice, we try to accomodate people and let them have those little things that makes the day go bye fast, like their music. As long as the music is stored locally and not on the server, we allow it. So to help people transition to their new PCs without losing their music I created a temporary server for them to use as a storage point instead of everyone trying to copy music out to their user directories and overloading our file and print servers. I sent out directions and an explination of what was allowed and how to do it all. Step by step. Every click and every thing you needed to type was in there. I am fairly certain any toddler that has mastered the use of his hands and fingers and can read the instructions could have handled it.

Here, however, we have grown adults pulling in good salaries that apparently can't. We had a user copy her music out to this temp server like she was supposed to. However, when it came time to copy it back to her local C: drive, she failed. On an epic level. Instead of selecting her music folder from the temp server, she managed to select EVERYONES folder. And then, instead of copying it to her C: drive, she attempted to copy it to her user folder. So instead of a couple hundered MP3s ending up on her local drive, she attempted to copy upwards of 13,000 of them to her home directory. Essentially managing to single handedly do exactly what we were trying to avoid in the first place. Filling up and overloading the file server. /sigh

Just goes to show you.. try to make something idiot proof and along comes a better idiot. Have a great plan in place? No problem. They will find a way to fuck it up. As they say, where there is a will, there is an moron that is going to screw the pooch there is a way!

But enough of that.. here's some Jim Gaffigan to take you into the weekend!

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Some people...

Most of you that read this know that we are in the process of upgrading all of our desktops at work. This means for the last two months, we have been constantly reminding everyone to make SURE they have all their important files stored on their home directory. These directories are on our file servers, which means they are backed up and will also still be available to them when their desktop is replaced. Simple concept right? Apparently not.

So far we have had at least 3 people suddenly need their old desktop back because they forgot files on that machine. After repeated emails and our techs asking them point blank when they are swapping out machines "Did you get all your files moved to the network?" .. they still didn't get it done. This requires us digging through piles of old machines to find their. Time consuming and pointless. But hey.. we are a 'service' department and we live to please! Or at least thats what I think we are supposed to believe.

Yesterday however, took the cake. I had a frantic user call up because he wanted to make sure that somehow, someway, he got a machine with a floppy drive in it. You know, those little 3.5" square things that people used to use before the invention of the CD Drive, DVD Drive and USB drives? Yeah.. those things. Why did he need one? He is still storing important business data on floppies. Never mind the fact that he has access to both his personal network share as well as several departmental ones to store it on. Never mind the fact that floppies have a high failure rate. Never mind that floppy drives were NOT purchased for the new machines on purpose. Never mind that their massive 1.4MB of storage is about as useful as a talented musician would be to a Rascall Flats concert.

I tried to patiently explain that he should copy the data off those floppies to the network share and he was concerned that it would "Take up too much space on the network". I told him to do it anyway, that living on the edge was life was all about! He wasn't convinced. I then told him to do it anyway because when those floppies broke, I was going to go down to his desk with the midget rodeo clown I am going to hire for the sole purpose of taunting him for being a moron.

After about 20 minutes of dealing with this rocket surgeon, I finally get him off the phone with his assurances that he is backing up his files and whatnot. 10 minutes after that I get a call from him saying that after he deleted some files off his hard drive, that some of the files on the network share for his department aren't working. I figured he accidentally deleted some of the network files, so I set about tracking them down to restore them. Only all I found was shortcuts on the network share.

Instead of actually copying or moving the files to the network share, he just copied shortcuts to them. Then of course, he proceeded to delete them from his hard drive. Oh, and these were not files he backed up to his almighty floppies. Now I realize that not everyone is a 'computer' person. But c'mon. It says "Shortcut to blahblah". The options when you drag a file over to a location like that are: Copy Here, Move Here or Create Shortcut Here. Two of those options would have worked fine for him. But he managed to pick the third and entirely useless option.

Needless to say, he was rather upset when he was informed by me that he was SOL on those files. He was also upset when he called every other person in my department and got the same answer about his files and his stupidity.

I suppose I should be thanking him though. Its people like him that make me want to hit him in the face with a shovel keep me employed. So I salute you Mr. ChampionOfTheFloppyDrive. Party on!

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Aaaand we're back!

I know you all missed me terribly and while I had my laptop with me in AZ, I just didn't find the motivation to blog. It was much more fun to hang out with my nephews, play rock band or chill outside with a book, a beer and a cigar.

But I'm back now. Vacation was awesome and I had a fabulous time visiting with my immediate and extended family that made the journey to AZ for Zane's baptism. We ate too much, drank too much and just had a great time all around.

My nephew Caden, who didn't want water on his head and was very happy that it was Zane's turn and not his, decided halfway through the proceedings that he wanted to be up with with mom and dad and so he walks up to the baptismal font. Well halfway anyway. He then stops on the second step and proceeds to lounge there looking like Cleopatra waiting for someone to feed him grapes and fan him. It was adorable. I snapped a good picture of it, just have to have my sister send it to me.

I got to visit and catch up with some friends from high school days as well while I was there which was good times. Did I mention beer? Had lots of good beer while I was there, but far and away the best I had was at a brewpub called BJ's. If there is one near you.. go try their Jeremaih Red. It's absolutely fantastic. Check it out HERE.

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D I A F.

You can't swing a dead cat without hitting a news story about the economy these days. Everywhere around the country and around the world people are struggling to make ends meet. People are losing their jobs. Families who had no financial worries a few years ago are suddenly finding themselves struggling to make ends meet and just keep a roof over their heads.

I realize the rich in the world live in some kind of alternate reality, but read this and tell me to do not want to literally set this guy and his stupid fucking dog on fire. LINK-TO-OMG-WTF

There are stories all the time about the excesses of the rich, but to spend 4.2mil on a tiara for a 8lb dog? That is just a whole different realm of excess. Maybe he shouldn't die in a fire though. That would be too quick and wouldn't really get the point across. What would be really awesome is if we could pull of some kind of 'Trading Places' situation like they did with Dan Akroyd and Eddie Murphy in the movie. Take that pompus idiot and strip away all his money and houses and make him work at McD's for minimum wage. Make him go home to a 1 bedroom apartment and live off top ramen. Give the fucker some perspective because obviously someone who can drop 4mil on dog bling has ZERO contact with reality.

If you haven't seen the Lewis Black bit where he talks about rich people and the stupid shit they do, check it out.



"I don't believe you one-up someone just by buying something bigger.. if you really want to shake someone up and fuck with them, what you do is use that money in a way they never imagine. You know what I would have done with that money? I would hire a young woman in her 20's and pay her an amazing salary .. give her the best pension and health insurance.. and she would be my personal ball washer."

As outrageous as that sounds, at least he would be employing someone with the money he is spending. Watch the whole video though as he talks about the excesses of the overly rich and the idiots that stole all that money from their companies like Adelphia and Enron. Lewis Black is a riot. I would love to go drinking with him.

Maltese dogs are lame to begin with.. but now with that tiara, I really want to have someone dangle a treat in the air so the dog is standing on his back legs like he is tee'd up and then punt his ugly little ass through the uprights on a football field. His tiara would of course fall off and I would take it, sell it and use the money to pay a whole mass of people to do nothing but follow that tool around and call him and idiot non-stop til he goes insane and checks into an asylum. Look at this picture and tell me you don't have an overwhelming urge to drop kick his smug little tiara-wearing ass.

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